We all have to deal with a yucky situation from time to time. Specifically, we have to deal with yucky people. Do you ever spend time with someone (or a group of people) and just feel the life being drained out of you as if there was a steady leak? Do you ever leave a situation and just feel yucky // depressed // unhappy // anxious // sad // regretful // irritable? Noticeably different than before?
If this is you, there are some things you should know.
First, it’s not you. I used to feel bad when I felt (insert negative emotion here) after spending time with certain people. I used to think maybe there was something that I could do different or better. But that is not always the case. Sometimes we simply do not vibe with the energy that other people give off.
Haven’t you ever met someone and hit it off right away? And in the same sense, meeting someone and immediately knowing that you probably won’t be spending too much time with that person. It’s just a knowing that us humans have. It explains why you don’t have the desire to be friends with, marry or have sex with every person that you meet.
Secondly, you can’t change other people. If every time you spend time with your parents, it makes you feel like crap afterwords, don’t focus on changing them… instead focus on channeling that negative energy. You do not have to sit with it for an hour or a day or even a week after a negative event! There are ways to deal with detoxing yourself from a negative experience that actually work.
YOUR BAG OF TRICKS
To Detox After A Negative Experience
- Wash Your Hands. Symbolically, you are washing away the negative experience. Maybe you got into a fight with someone, someone cut you off in traffic, you can’t let go of what someone said to you today, you had to spend time with life-sucking people, etc… simply wash it away. I realize that it may not be simple, but making this a conscious habit really does help. It may seem silly at first but it really does work. Imagine leaving work each day and ridding yourself of the negative energy that your boss or coworker drowned you in all day… would that change your mood? Your home life? Your marriage? Relationships? Choose to let this be how you are going to rid your mind and body of the negative energy that you soaked in.
- Write it & Burn it. In the same sense, symbolically burn away whatever it is that you’re holding onto by writing it down on a piece of paper and burning it.
I’m newly obsessed with Cleo Wade, author of Heart Talk. She gave me the best gift ever:
Mantra For Anxiety:
This is not you. This is something moving through you. It can leave out of the same door it came in.
– Cleo Wade
When I experience something negative, it always puts me in a rut of anxiety. This mantra (and revelation, really) puts me at ease almost immediately. It’s truth; we were not created to hold on to negative experiences… they are simply just passing through. So, let them.
Find you some mantras for every circumstance in life. Perhaps you could use scriptures, short poems, sayings or just a word or two.
Don’t Eat Bad:
The worst time to skip out on eating well is after a negative experience. Though, this is probably the time that you want to binge the most… don’t.
Did you know that sugar IMMEDIATELY changes the microbiome in your gut? Did you also know that there are tons of factual research that points to a correlation between your mood & the condition of your microbiome? So in short, the worst time to eat bad is when you need to improve your mood.
“Within you there is a STILLNESS & a SANCTUARY to which you can
retreat at anytime and be yourself.”
Though a get away is always nice, you can retreat at any point in time within yourself. I never used to know what this meant… How do you retreat to yourself?
- First, you do something that actually makes you feel better. Don’t just do what other people are doing to “feel better”. Do whatever it is that YOU love. Your soul lights up when you are experiencing something that you genuinely love. You connect to yourself on a deeper level and your mood improves exponentially.
- Recognize things that are true about you. Sometimes, when in a negative situation, we can feel FALSE; we feel false emotions, false thoughts, a false sense of hope. Re-centering and realizing what is actually true and valid about you is helpful.
- Spend time alone. Retreating means to go away, to be alone. Even when we’re around the people that we can be most ourselves with, we are still trying to be present with them… Spending time alone allows you to get lost & truly retreat within yourself. Spending time with others after a negative situation can be helpful in the form of distraction, however, it definitely promotes word vomiting and passing your negative energy build-up onto them.
- Solve a (different) problem. Though the negative situation you are retreating from may very well be a problem, try to find a different one to focus on. Humans get the greatest level of satisfaction from problem solving. Believe it or not, we do it all day long subconsciously.
There are obviously many other forms of detoxification, but all of these methods are valuable tools to help you channel the negative funk you build up after encountering a negative experience. You spend a lot of time taking care of yourself & embracing wellness… don’t let all of those methods, tools, tricks & tips fly out the window when you are faced with negativity.
Peace, love & wellness,