Closing The Gap (Between Where You Are & Where You Want To Be)

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There’s no gap seemingly larger than the one between where you are right now, and where you want to be.

Some days, some months, some seasons – everything that you’ve ever wanted can feel so in-reach and tangible. Like – if you’d just extend out your arm and grab it, it’d be yours.

Then there’s most times – where everything not only feels out of reach and intangible, but maybe it also feels a little over your head.¬†Like, who am I to want this? Or to think that I could ever actually have it?

Whatever it is that’s on the other side of your gap can & will be yours. Even if what’s standing between you and that thing is really big, intimidating, scary, expensive, painful or all of the above. People are doing it every. damn. day.

People LESS qualified than you are living out YOUR big dream! Sure, they didn’t get there overnight or without difficulty… but they got there. And my question to you is – what is the difference between you, and someone who has what you want?

Closing The Gap

  • Maybe we’ll start there – who’s life do you want?

Let’s be clear: you want YOUR life. You should absolutely embrace your birth-right and design a beautifully, unique life. However, I don’t see anything wrong with a little inspiration. Sort of in the same way that you’d consult Pinterest before writing your Instagram caption… So, who is it? Who has the job that you could see yourself working? Who’s got the killer body that you’d love to have? Who’s work ethic do you admire? Who’s marriage is fruitful? Etc.

Look to this person and study them! They must be doing something right, right? Maybe adopt some of their healthy habits until you are inspired enough to create your own. Or copy their workouts, because why reinvent the wheel? Or ASK them about their relationship and what has worked/not worked for them.

I’m a firm believer that we are all in each other’s lives on purpose. Perhaps it’s to help each other along in this way; inspiring each other with bits and pieces of our lives that we’ve excelled at and looking to each other for a little love in the areas that are under construction.

  • Close the gap on where you are now and where you’ve BEEN.

I talk about gratitude a lot – so it shouldn’t surprise you that it’s threaded into this idea of ¬†closing the gap. Because where you’re at right now, is a whole heck of a lot better than where you’ve been. And if looking back at your own growth doesn’t encourage you to believe in yourself, then perhaps you’ve never done it.

I’ve never met a victory story that didn’t bring me to tears, inspire me to live a better life, refine my perspective or all three happening at once.

You’re. An. Over. Comer.

You’ve overcome more than you’re probably giving yourself credit for. And looking back to that place that you USED to be is like the little Mario Kart star power to where you WANT to be.

I’ve been in some really shitty places. The girl I am today wouldn’t be friends with the girl I’ve been in past seasons. But to be able to say that I’ve grown from that place means that I have what it takes to go somewhere even further. I wasn’t stuck & neither are you.

You’re not moving backwards, you’re moving forwards. And just to note: sometimes it can very much so feel like you’re slipping back to that place that you used to be and like all progress has been lost – but I’m here to tell you that sling shots get pulled back first before they shoot a bajillion miles forward. That’s all.

  • Where you’ve been is now muscle memory.

Oooo I love muscle memory. It like gets me excited. I think it’s the coolest thing in the world that you can somewhat trick your body into being used to something. Giving it that all too familiar sensation of I’VE BEEN HERE BEFORE.

Yoga teachers create classes based around this idea; building up to a more challenging pose with similar but easier poses throughout the class. So that when you do get to that crazy posture – your body says “Oh, this is just like…”

I’ve. Been. Here. Before.

It’s okay – Because I’ve been here before. I know how to handle this, I know how to overcome this, I know what’s behind that corner.

It eliminates fear as a limitation in closing your gap because you already know what to do. You’ve done it. Maybe this obstacle looks slightly different, but when you boil it down – you’ve been there before. Somehow, some way. And your body, mind, soul all remember.

So, why not use that tool in every corner of your life? We all know that we have this super convenient tendency as humans to want to retreat to what’s familiar (even if it’s God awful) because it’s familiar. Haven’t you ever questioned why we do that? Maybe because it’s useful. Use what is familiar to you… use it often and use it well.

Use whatever the heck you’ve been through as a bridge right across that gap. More than likely, what you’ve been through holds significance to your journey anyways… because everything is significant… because what you’ve been through has been preparing you…


I wrote this because I’m discouraged about closing my gap and it really encourages me to encourage you. I challenge you to maybe first identify the gaps that you want to close in your life, but then write out or draw out a list of obstacles that are currently filling up your gap.

For me, it’s time. I never can seem to get ahead of time like we’re always racing. I also feel like time is slipping through my fingers. I’m going to be 25 in two months and I’m not where I want to be for where I’d love to be at 25 – GAP.

But I’ve dealt with this before. Even simply driving to work – racing against the clock because I’m going to be late. How have I remedied that in the past? I woke up earlier… It seems simple, but maybe if I woke up a little bit earlier, I’d have more time to work on the projects that I’m working on.

Closing your gap is really what makes up your quality of life. You can choose to sit on one side of what you want and never attempt to make it even close because of what is seemingly standing in your way. Or you can choose to try – and maybe fall a little short – and try some more. Because even in that journey, you’re increasing your quality of life. So, decide. Decide what kind of life you want to have. And close the gap every which way that you already know how to.

-E&F

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